I really hate being unsure.
I don't like feeling lost and not sure where to go or what to do. Double guessing myself and being full of anxiety. I know it's normal for me. I know it's part of all the craziness that is me. My problem is most of the time I don't know I am in it til I start taking it out on people. I hate that most. I don't want to be that person. That person that makes everything everyone else's problem or fault. That is just straight ridiculous.
I am an adult. I am grown woman who makes mistakes and bad choices. I am a yeller by nature. I was raised in a screamin demon home. I hate that I have no patience and I hate that I can take things out on people that did nothing wrong or at least nothing wrong that even pertains to what I am upset about or have on my mind. I don't want to be the raving mad woman that people don't want to talk to or be honest with.
Being open minded and honest is very important to me. If you do something I don't like I am going to tell you. Because quite frankly, I think you should know its not attractive. Kind of like telling someone they have lipstick on their teeth or a booger in their nose. Hell I would want to know!
My point is this, I know I am back and forth. I know I am up and down and usually side to side as well. For this I am sorry. It's not fair to the people around me that love me and actually want to be around me. It will get better because I want it to. And I can make that happen if I try.
Much Love,
Mrs Mommy
4 comments:
If it makes you feel any better I'm the same way! (except I'm too shy to tell people what I think)
Yeah, I tend to yell too much, too easy, trying to change that though.
We need to find someone that teaches patients!
By the way, why haven't I seen any of your cakes here?
Hmm, this kind of reminds me of the chat we had on Saturday. XOXO Love ya girl!
i really really do know how you feel.
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